Easy

Don't you think it would have been easier to live back in the Little House on the Prairie days

When Central Asia, the Middle East, Africa, and on, were all far off places, when all countries but your own and the motherland were packed with myths and exotic tales
All so exotic. Exotic, fabled, and foreign. Their problems, wars, and pains, unknown to you. And no one would fault you for your lack of knowledge and lack of care.

Now though, now if you don't know, I see you as a hypocrite
For saying you care when you don't
You care
But not the world around not even
Around the whole of society you
Don't care
Well where's the use in caring,
When all it does is hurt. Right?

Because you don't have time
No time to care
Because you're here now, and here now means focusing on you you you
University tells you, tells you to do good, tells us it will equip you
But then you forget and you get lost sitting in a class that's all symbols and formulas and no people
But this is supposed to help them one day. Right?
University begs us to get wrapped up in ourselves
Forces our heads down to desks full of formulas and concentrates us on grades
Compares us with everyone around
And tells us each assignment matters
Then reminds us of the world and all its problems

Tells us of the futility of it all and how

Even if you want to do something good

No good thing is simply good - it's all wrapped up in prejudice and overly Western influence and white-saviour complexes

But do, do good.

You could forget to

But even then even if you don't forget, even if you figure out what to do

It's all so big and far and foreign and who are you?

They yell at you and say it's none of your business that we'll take care of our own

And that you should take care of your own.

Yes yes I should I should.

And I'll be well-paid too

How nice. Because I'm here.

No that's good then. That's good.

Because then you can give it all away

All all away

.... I know I probably won't.

If I get anywhere that is.

But see that's about me. And me and me and me

That's this time in your life

To care about you

So that one day

....

One day what?

The family

The family is so important

Yes that I'll go with that

Focus on the micro because many good micros will eventually build into one grand macro, one good picture

But NO

Still the money is mismanaged there and education is inadequate and they're all dying all dying

Abortion is birth control and HIV says you're singled out for divine punishment

They're lies all lies and how will they know! All the people! I don't speak Kyrgyz

Who does? Who'll go and tell them? The Canada travel advisory says avoid non-essential travel because everyone robs and thievery and assault are rampant.

Well it should be local anyways right. Right right right. That's what they've been telling us. That's what's ideal.

But many doctors won't treat HIV patients or demand danger pay. Danger pay. Masks marked up by 500% corruption corruption. Are people caring? People are caring. They are. I hope the Church.... I hope....

I hope they're there and caring.

I can't do anything anyways. In and of myself. I know, believe me I know, a thousand times over. And I'm afraid of not even wanting to. Caring here first. Here where I am. But ...... Excuses are easy to come by, especially if you don't know whether or not they're excuses or legitimate arguments.

Pray.

Pray pray pray. That's all we can do.

Even there though.... There's SO MUCH to pray for. And I can't do it all at all. (Ask others) okay. Okay. How do you get others to care when you hardly know if you care enough yourself? When you don't have the time and I don't feel like a prayer warrior

Only God will make all things right

But we we have no idea

And we sit here with our problems -

Are they valid?

The stress the relationships the questions about the future the worry about all this -

They're valid because they reflect how we all desperately need God

But on the other hand it makes me wonder sometimes

Did all of my problems surface because I have so much time and lack of worry about survival in living my upper middle class life? ... Time and enough needs taken care of so that I had the chance to come up with new worries? Are these worries even necessary?

Is any worry necessary.

I need to find someone else who cares

But it's really hard to care and keep caring when you figure there's not much you can do.

(Don't think you're some hero who has to carry it all because HE carries it all.)

I think it's because I'm fearful of how easy it is to fall into apathy. I don't want to be apathetic but ............ What's the use in JUST talking about it

And JUST caring about it all anyways

Without action. Is there a purpose to being "informed"?

To being informed when all it makes you want to do is collapse under it all because you know YOU can't take care of any of it? Is there a point in just talking, in just awareness about ALL of the injustice and discrimination and hate and ignorance?

Look for the joy. Remember that it's not all bleak (but sometimes I feel that it IS all bleak!)

And one day one day HE will make all things right and all things well

It's just

That

.....

What are we to do until then?

How hopeful, how optimistic should we become?

I have a hard time hoping and praying for revival when some parts of the Bible seem to say that things will just get worse until Jesus comes back.

But then

There's other philosophies too that say, that say things will get better and better until He comes, that we are to build the kingdom of Heaven on earth

Does this mean there's hope for now? And that there is a point in doing all we can? To heal both physically and spiritually?

There's just so so much.

And only He can take care of it all.

The stories in the news

Everything looks dark

"The newspaper is God's to do list delivered right to my front door" - Archbishop Desmond Tutu

It's an awful lot to do.

I don't want to want to escape.

(Don't end on a hopeless note. Because it doesn't end hopelessly.
He's here, you know. He's there. He. Is. There. And HE doesn't tire or grow weary or stressed and HE IS able and fully equipped. It's not up to you. It's not up to you. He is willing and able and cares consistently and more than you ever can or will. So pray. Pray to Him and be where you are now.)

Act justly and love mercy and walk humbly with Your God. {Micah 6:8}
Be thankful. LET the peace of Christ rule in your hearts. Put on love. {Colossians 3:14-17}
Love one another deeply. {1 Peter 4:8}

The Remembering

I've been reminiscing lately, and re-going over, parts of some of my absolute favourite book series, The Chronicles of Narnia. They're the sorts of books one could read a thousand times over, at least in my experience, and still come up with new insights, and old, wonderful reminders that provide a glimpse into the character, heart, beauty, and majesty of God. I could go on about these stories for a while, but that's not really the point of today's post. What it leads to is this: As I was in this C.S. Lewis vein of thought (and consequently, in a C.S. Lewis vein of internet procrastination), I stumbled across this quote from another of Lewis's novels, Out of the Silent Planet. I'll admit I've only read a part of this book (part one of a trilogy), but it seems it's high time to read more:

"A pleasure is full grown only when it is remembered. You are speaking, Hmān, as if the pleasure were one thing and the memory another. It is all one thing. The séroni could say it better than I say it now. Not better than I could say it in a poem. What you call remembering is the last part of the pleasure, as the crah is the last part of a poem. When you and I met, the meeting was over very shortly, it was nothing. Now it is growing something as we remember it. But still we know very little about it. What it will be when I remember it as I lie down to die, what it makes in me all my days till then–that is the real meeting. The other is only the beginning of it."

I think sometimes that memories are frowned upon as these fragile things, that are either of no value, being only whisps of a past reality, or else dangerous entities, holding the possibility of escape to something that is no longer real. To be sure, there is a fine line to walk here - we live life in a constant, ever-moving present, and so should not become wrapped up in the past... But there is a strange and appealing beauty to the concept of pleasant memories that continue to live, developing and affecting our present ... The idea of a "real meeting" occurring when you see how the initial event has changed and moved you, "what it makes in me all my days till then- that is the real meeting." 
An important experience, a wonderful encounter -- it need not simply die the moment it ends. It has the potential to grow fuller and more meaningful as time passes, and as it influences what you experience in moments both now and to come. Of course, a memory may die too, and sometimes that is for the better. Sometimes time shows you that it was not, perhaps, all that special or worth the cost of remembering it to begin with, and you are really better off forgetting. 
But "real" meetings, initial moments being merely a shadow of something more - I think that's a rather captivating idea. 

Vignette

He was sitting alone, with his dreadlocks, long pony tail, plaid, and cropped jeans. Hiking boots with wool socks too. And, the accordion. In a newly gated off area, he was at the centre; a stage was off to the side, signifying the evening's main attraction was to come.
But he, so solitary and typically grunge-accordionist, gave the whole place its atmosphere:
The square was almost austere in the posed-ness of it all, with the mix of many hipster-types, post-work day 9 to 5'ers, moms, hippies, old men... All frozen, quizzical, critical, lost in thought, enjoying the day and the moment. The music wasn't happy - it was somewhat rough, in fact - and neither was the sky. It was all very muted, enjoyed, and... too nice. The young, cool people were smoking and pensive. They couldn't be bothered to smile, but I think that's the way they like it sometimes. A grandma got up with her grandson and tried to dance with him, but it didn't last.




The shame was that I saw no one drop money in the accordionist's case, even though they were all staring at him. Maybe they were afraid to walk into the centre of the ring and be observed, or too busy exhaling ribbons of smoke.
As I left and dropped some change, I was rewarded with the most genuine of smiles. The air felt happier as credence was given to the moment's maker.

Homecoming

It was sad and wonderful and comforting yet estranging all at once. Stepping off the plane, walking down the arrivals ramp, and seeing them, the beautiful four, all together, filled me with so much joy. Finally! I got to see their lovely, familiar faces, so casual and yet so happy, and got to step in and among them and hug them and be surrounded by family. That, is a very good feeling.

Four months is not so long; others have gone longer. Nonetheless, I'd have to say that, at this particular point in life, four months apart was quite long enough.

I love my family very much. Their quirks, hugs, arguments, smiles, encouragement, humour, are all delightful. ... Actually, they do annoy me at times, but overall, none can compare, obviously! They're my family.

However, being home has been a little more difficult than I expected. I spent my first couple days back trying to pinpoint exactly why. Why on earth was I feeling homesick for Montreal?! Because that was the feeling: homesickness. I talked with my parents about booking flights back on the first evening home (for complicated potential-employment reasons), since I'm returning to Montreal for most of the summer, and, completely without thinking, I referred to Montreal as "home".

"Well, it would be good for me to arrive home by mid-May..." .... "Wait honey, home? Did you just call Montreal 'home'?" 

.... Oops. That was unwitting. It just kind of slipped out. My mom said, almost sadly, "You've adjusted so well." I guess that is most parents' dream and nightmare - they want their child to be happy, healthy, safe, well-adjusted, and surrounded by people who care for them, but they themselves also desire to be needed and wanted by their children.

For the first couple days, the homesick feeling persisted; it's still lingering a bit, in fact, but I think I'm doing better at embracing the moment and enjoying my time here while it lasts.

What I'd like to share, though, is why I've been missing Montreal so much in the first place.

The people. I've made what I consider to be some tremendous friendships over this past year. Some are with other scholars and fellow McGill students, but a large majority of the people who've made me feel at home come from my church. Having such a wonderful church community is a relatively new experience for me, and one that I was quite surprised by. I am so blessed to have been so welcomed, along with the other "BC girls". I could go on and on about these people, but I won't for the time being, as my fingers would probably cramp up, and it's almost bedtime. I'd recommend simply visiting me in Montreal and meeting all of them for yourself!

The city. There is so much diversity here! Of people, neighbourhoods, concerts, music, events, food. Montreal is truly a vibrant city. Coming from a rather culturally homogenous city, I've loved the change in pace and atmosphere. I think it can be quite good for a growing young person. I also have a small love affair with the city's transit system, la STM. I'm not entirely sure why, though. Most likely it's that I'd never used transit much before, so the STM is my first taste; I'm getting to know it more and more, and overall, it's rather friendly I'd say. Getting to know Montreal and creating a mental map of the island's layout is very satisfying.

The language. FRENCH. Well. Have I told you I love this language? I do. I really do. Anytime anyone is willing to speak with me in French, it brightens my day. I even love the Québécois accent! I mean, it makes comprehension rather difficult at times, but it is so tied up in the uniqueness of the Québécois identity, which makes it fascinating. (Though I must say, my own French has retained a certain level of "proper France-French" to it... This may be beginning to change, however.) The juxtaposition of Anglophone and Francophone Québécois culture is also very interesting to observe. Beginning to know and better understand some of the underlying tensions and history is so very very interesting and exciting.

Anyhow, most of this is simple surface stuff. What really made me feel quite bereft upon arriving home in BC is the sense that I'd stepped back in time. You know how most people say that they feel as though, once they've been away for a while, everything back home should have paused and stayed the same so that they could come back to everything as they'd left it, but then how that's never the case and things have always moved on and everyone has changed? In a sense, I felt the opposite. I was ready for everything to have changed and moved along, because that's how it had always been in the past when I'd gone away for a while. Besides, I'd changed and had begun to move along, so why shouldn't everyone else? 

But no. When I got back home, some things had changed, yes. The furniture was rearranged, my bed had strange pink apple sheets on it, my mom was working more often, and my dad had taken up karate, but... My role hadn't changed. (Selfish, I know. All about me.) Actually, I suppose it had changed a bit; I was now a returning university student who was able to sit at home and rest up while life continued on around me. However, my room was still where it used to be (thank goodness I wasn't relegated to the guest room!), our dog was still eager to be walked, I still lived on the same street, I had the same wonderful high school friends I was eager to hang out with, and I was just.... me. Stripped of all my Montreal experience and friendships and city and language affection. I walked the same stairs I'd been walking for the five years I'd lived in this house. The roads were the same and the language was the same. The lake was there like it's always been.

Of course, why on earth would any of this have changed?! That would just be silly. Rather nonsensical, in fact. But it struck me: everything was moving forward and changing for me in Montreal. I was growing up there and starting to become a little bit of an "adult". (In small ways; I suffer no illusions that I am some fully independent "grown-up" by this point at any means! but in Montreal, adulthood is definitely what I've been inching quite steadily towards.) It was in Montreal that I'd done a lot more learning than ever before on how to take care of myself, emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. It's in Montreal that the exploring, the discovering, the big choosing, the new-relationship building, was and is happening. That's not to say that some of it can't be carried on here. It's just rather difficult to transport relationships and a city and its lessons across the country. For me, at this point in my life, Montreal is where the movement is. It's where the newness continues and where I'm taking steps forward. I feel a little frozen here, being away from it all, even if only for a couple weeks. Things would be different if I knew I was staying in BC for a longer time, but I'm not. I'm headed back across the country soon to my second home. 

At the moment, that one is a little less safe and certain than my solid home here. Nothing can ever beat family in terms of feeling perfectly at home; I was born and raised in this British Columbian city, and I have no plans to leave it behind and forget about it (don't worry Mom and Dad :)). Besides, it's kind of gorgeous to say the least - a place everyone from Québec wants to visit! But more importantly, it's filled with beautiful people: old friends, grandparents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, parents... People, parents especially, who I'll always want and need on some level, be I here, Montreal, Mongolia, Morocco, or Monaco. Or even someplace that doesn't start with an "M"!

It's funny really, this outcome of the human ability to love so many people. If home is where the heart is, what is one to do if a rather large and motley crew of people can hold parts of your heart all at once? Let's just say that I think it's okay to have more than one home for the time being. One has a very strong and old foundation. The other's foundation is currently being laid, and the construction workers are doing quite the solid job so far. It's hard sometimes, to have your heart dragged in so many directions. But it's alright too, because, in truth, more homes just mean that there's a lot of love going around, and that makes me one very blessed girl.

Weird, and ever so slightly disconcerting.

That's the only way I can think to describe it. That feeling I got after the empty library had filled up and we'd all been there for eight hours or so, the sense that something about this all was so odd:
the brilliant young people sitting and sitting and sitting for hours on end, maybe eating, maybe studying instead, just poring over books. No social interactions, except for the guilty pleasure visit to Facebook. Cramming their heads... Us cramming our heads, actually, with knowledge until we'd lost all sense of excitement at the intake of new information.
What was the point? Does this even help? Well, um, yes. Yes I suppose it does. Good marks and all that. But it was just so strange to see rows upon rows of students filling themselves up with book-knowledge - it was as if they were all lined up just so, positioned so the feeder tubes could pour in information, and they all hoped it would stay in there long enough to allow them to succeed in life, even if they forgot everything right after the exam.
I know this all sounds normal - this is university Christina. That's what we do with ourselves.

Yes yes, okay. I'll do it too.

It's just that, at the end of the day, I get the sense that a little bit of the interestingness and will to do something with myself has been sucked out of me. But that's okay right? Exams will be over soon.

All I can say is that I hope there's a very good motivation behind all of this.... A very good point to it indeed.

It was empty at the start. Kind of pretty and hopeful actually!

Knowledge regurgitation FTW.

Cherubim Hymn

This is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard.
Listen and be at peace.

Une pause

Elle est perdue dans ses espoirs
Ses rêves -
irréels parfois, mais parfois
peut-être plus réels
possibles
proches...
qu'elle peut deviner.
Mais encore... peut-être que
ça n'est plus qu'une espérance.

Psychology & Realism

It's already begun:
I have some kind of irrational emotion, and I understand why I'm having it. Well that's convenient and useful for emotional well-being, but it can happen when I have whims too, dreams, lovely sentiments... Reason and knowledge of the mind swoop in and explain away all mystery.

I've only taken two psychology courses at McGill, and the way of thinking behind them has already infected my mind.

I realize the word "infected" makes it sound entirely unpleasant, but really, it's not completely, and I use "infected" only because once this mindset grabs hold of you, it becomes difficult to ever let it go. Being able to explain human behaviour, or at least feel like you can, does have its perks: it helps enormously in conflict resolution, counselling, moving past harmful irrationality, understanding others... etc. etc. The trouble is, there are times when I don't want to understand everything, and don't want to unravel every mystery. Naturally, this begs the deeper question: is it wrong to want to avoid knowledge, to remain in ignorance?

Generally, my answer to this question would be yes, it is wrong: one should seek truth!
I do stand by that, but I think that when it comes to the human mind, there are times when explanations turn out to be inaccurate and/or unnecessary. Inaccurate in that they don't do justice to the mind's true state of affairs, and unnecessary in that they can stifle creativity and imagination.

Life is nice with a little mystery, with a few things that can't be explained away by logic, and humans are one of the more mysterious and interesting groups to observe! Human life and emotion in all its complexity is fascinating to wonder about and experience. Often, when realism kicks in in the middle of some imaginative train of thought, it kills it, and all you're left with is a feeling of "Oh. Well, I suppose that makes sense then." It can be quite the letdown.

The reason I'm so focused on psychology is because I'm considering studying both it and linguistics, and the time for course selection has arrived. At this moment, the thought of pursuing courses that try to explain and understand human behaviour and mental processes is a little disheartening. I feel as though it might quash some of my creative spirit. Maybe that's silly. Maybe, like the physicist who understands matter and goes on to research the possibility of string theory, I could use this knowledge to think past what is and consider what more could be discovered - that requires imagination!
(I know that physics isn't the same as psychology, yes yes, but allow me to draw the hopeful parallel.)

After all, isn't all education about seeking to understand more and more?

It really does change your perspective though, psychology. It applies to everything, making it hard to get out of your mind, because it's the study of, well, you, and everyone around you, which is why it's so popular! And important. Sometimes, this seems fascinating, but at other times, like right now, I feel as though I don't want to have a bundle of knowledge explaining away the wonderment and curiosity that comes from having mysteries of the mind to explore. Is it wrong to purposefully avoid certain knowledge and simply live out the human experience?

If anyone has an opinion, I would very much like to hear it!

If you're feeling anxious

Lots of life going on lately.
I find this song so so calming and dreamy. Music is one of the best remedies for stress; good music can lift you out of life and put you in a moment removed from everything else. In that separation, it can soothe your soul, give you time to think clearly, and ease you back into reality. Music, beauty, gives you a fresh perspective.
This song has yet to fail to relax, especially when I'm stressed and studying.
"Ollie Falls Asleep" - Berlinist. Enjoy :)

Self-promoting narcissists

You may already know this, but for context’s sake I’ll make my predicament/(fortune?) known:

This summer, I must find a job. But not your typical student summer job, mind you. No, it has to be a tad more involved, more along the lines of an upper-level, paid internship. Problem is, I don’t exactly have a CV filled with the skills most insurance companies or typical businesses would be looking for, and I’m supposed to find a position with a “profit-driven company”. So how do I convince a business that I’m worth hiring? (Because I am TOTALLY worth hiring by the way ;))

Well, I read a blog post recently, and it looks like I have some work to do.

I highly recommend actually reading the article, but if you don’t, here’s the gist of it:

Women, in general, are less willing than men to be totally ballsy and bluff their way into work that they’re not necessarily qualified for. This author, "Clay Shirky", suggests that women aren’t as willing as men to be “self-promoting narcissists” to get their way. Of course that doesn't mean that this is true of all women, or that all men find it easy to be "self-aggrandizing jerks" when the situation calls for it, but the author does have a point in noting that a lot more men seem to become famous in their chosen fields than women, and this isn’t because women are under-qualified - it would seem many (more?) men simply know when and how to effectively exaggerate their abilities! Anyways, if you want the whole story, just read the post. Seriously.

Now, I'm thinking that, as far as generalizations go, if we're going to say women have trouble promoting themselves, then we'd better say that perfectionists have quite the tough time as well, as do Christians, and others belonging to religious groups that also emphasize being humble. 

Perfectionists are hard on themselves, and often less likely to discuss how fantastic they are because of the near-impossible standards they regularly hold themselves to.

As far as religious beliefs go, those seeking to live lives of humility are probably not the first ones to start tooting their own horns.

As a Christian female with perfectionist tendencies... Well, you get the picture. Though really, whether or not you possess one or all three of these traits, it will probably be hard to intensely self-promote if you don't believe in your own, well, awesomeness.  So a first step is reminding yourself of your God-given gifts and abilities. I am not, however, going to write a whole post convincing you of how everyone is fantastic - that for the moment is up to you, and hopefully some lovely people in your life :)

Now, once one is feeling more confident overall, and that they'd be very much worth hiring, the time comes to start sounding like what could be perceived as a bit of an egotist. I'm not just talking about the classic, "I am a hard-working individual, quick learner, blah blah blah etc." spiel. (Though this is good CV stuff, and these are important qualities.) No, as the aforementioned blog post mentions, and as I've been encouraged to do this past summer at "scholar camp", I'm thinking more about the persistent emails, the CV drop-off follow ups, the convincing self-pitches about how your work is FANTASTIC, how your potential employer would be infinitely better off with you as part of his/her team. It all makes me think of Gilmore Girls, as many things do, (THE best show, in my humble opinion), Season 6, Episode 9, in which college student Rory Gilmore works to get her desired position: (You can skip the example below if you don't like reading TV show scripts and/or examples... But it's a good one!)

[At the office of the Stamford Eagle Gazette]

RORY [jumps up]: She's pointing at me!

MR. WOOLES: Rory Gilmore!

RORY: As you live and breathe.

MR. WOOLES: Uh, I'm sorry, did we, uh -

RORY: No, we didn't have an appointment. I just thought I would come down here and talk to you about a job.

MR. WOOLES: A job?

RORY: A beginning staff writer job, to be exact.

MR. WOOLES: Okay, I think maybe we got our signals crossed earlier. I thought I was clear, I don't have any jobs available.

RORY: No, you were very clear. You said you didn't have any jobs available and I heard you. I have excellent hearing, among my many other qualifications which I have listed here on my resume. [She hands him an envelope.]

MR. WOOLES: Your -

RORY: And my portfolio. [She picks up two large binders.] Samples of all my writing. All my work from the Yale Daily News, plus a couple of spec pieces that I've just recently finished. Ideas, potential pitches, theater reviews. [She hands him the binders.]

MR. WOOLES: Well, I'm sure that this is all -

RORY: Look, I know that this is very spur of the moment, but I thought maybe you could find a minute to sit down and talk with me.

MR. WOOLES: About what?

RORY: About a job.

MR. WOOLES: But I don't have any job openings.

RORY: I know, but see, earlier, when we were on the phone, you were so positive and optimistic, and you said so many complimentary things! I mean, frankly, you made me sound great! So great that I thought, hey, you should hire that girl.

MR. WOOLES [shaking his head]: But -

RORY: I already know most of the staff! The rhythm of this place. How it runs. I know where you keep the pens. I have personally fixed the copier in that coffee room on more than ten occasions. But the bottom line is, Mitchum was wrong. I am a very good writer. And I have great organizational skills, yes, but I know how to come at an article. I have a point of view. A voice. And - big selling point - I am a huge bargain.

MR. WOOLES: Rory, these are wonderful points, but I have nothing at this moment!

RORY: If you could sit down and talk with me I bet we could work that out.

MR. WOOLES: I have no time to sit and talk with you today. I'm sorry.

RORY: Look. I have sent my resume to several other papers. I'm not worried about finding a position. I'm worried about finding the right position. The right place for me. I think this is the right place for me.

MR. WOOLES: Well, it's not the right place for you, because there is no place for you! I have no job openings!

RORY: Give me ten minutes of your time and I bet I can change your mind.

MR. WOOLES: I don't have ten minutes.

RORY: I would be invaluable to you here.

MR. WOOLES: If I gave you a job I'd have to fire Harry.

RORY: Five minutes.

MR. WOOLES: Sorry.

RORY: That's okay. I can wait.

[She sits down and folds her hands in her lap.]  

Rory's persistence eventually pays off, and Mr. Wooles hires her. Naturally, this isn't representative of all circumstances, but your chances of being hired increase substantially the more appealing you appear to your prospective employer, and how will he/she know how amazing you are unless you tell him/her? And subsequently remind them by resurfacing? (Because CVs can get buried and forgotten pretty quickly.) Of course, this doesn't mean that once you've been very firmly rejected you should keep showing up; that could lead to a restraining order. However, as long as there's a possibility, however slight, of success, keep going for it! Declare that you have impressive accomplishments and are enthused by the prospect of working at your desired company! As the blog post first mentioned suggests, perhaps be so obnoxious as to have other people start thinking you're rather narcissistic. You may not get the job you want if you aren't able or willing to risk sounding full of yourself to some people. But really, how important is it what you sound like to them? The post's author writes:

It’s tempting to imagine that women could be forceful and self-confident without being arrogant or jerky, but that’s a false hope, because it’s other people who get to decide when they think you’re a jerk, and trying to stay under that threshold means giving those people veto power over your actions. To put yourself forward as someone good enough to do interesting things is, by definition, to expose yourself to all kinds of negative judgments, and as far as I can tell, the fact that other people get to decide what they think of your behavior leaves only two strategies for not suffering from those judgments: not doing anything, or not caring about the reaction. [Italics mine.]

And that is a wonderful argument, especially for those of us who fear being perceived as too "over the top"... It really applies to lots of things in life.

Anyhow, I write all this as if to some external audience, but in reality, I am writing to myself as much as anyone. I hope I can put some of these principles and suggestions to use in the job/internship hunt this summer, and I hope you can too, if ever they seem to be of use!

PS - I hope that this ridiculously long post somewhat makes up for my prolonged lack of updates.

Typique

Welcome back to Montréal ... It's snowed heaps and heaps these past two days.
Yesterday, from the warmth of residence, I looked out the window onto the courtyard, and the cutest thing:
Three boys, the term "boys" being loosely used I suppose, still, standing on a path slightly lower than our courtyard's field - they were contemplating the field, which is covered in almost two feet of snow, with shovels and hockey sticks in hand. One of them wore a bright red toque.
Far too adorably classic; they're going to make an ice rink. Typiquement canadien.